Perfect World

For the past few days, I've been feeling horribly useless, and like a huge burden. I've been beating myself up mentally, over and over again, and every night I hate myself a little more. But just a simple gesture from my grandmother earlier today, made things so much better. 

Just a few hours back, while I was in church, I was called up to do a prayer for the offerings. They asked me to do the prayers a few days back, and I didn't want to, but eventually I did. 

So anyway, when I was done with it, I sat down and looked at my grandmother. I was sitting 2 rows behind her, but I could hear her clearly when she turned to her neighbour and said (in chinese), "that's my granddaughter."

It's just a simple sentence, but with so much impact. In that moment (nope, not gonna use perk's line), I felt like I finally did something right, I finally did somebody proud. 

It was a happy feeling :')

I'll talk about my amazing weekend later on. And amazing was an understatement. Sigh, my mood back in dad's place is indirectly proportional to my mood at my gramps' place. The more fun I have there, the more upset I am here. :(