I got problems but I don’t have anyone to talk to about it and I know I should be used to it but tonight I’m really not. Maybe I’m just tired of listening to people’s problems right now cause I don’t know how to deal with mine. 

I feel so lonely.

I feel like I’m stuck in a very toxic relationship except that I’m the toxic one. 

I always pray to die young because I can’t stand living with myself. 

You barged into my home in February and revealed all the disgusting sins in my heart. I feel like I'm going crazy.

I’m really grumpy.

I’m sorry I’m the worst piece of shit ever. I wish your daughter didn’t give birth to me, all the time. 

Buying insurance seems meaningless when you’re not a big fan of living. 

Why do some people struggle with sins that don’t make them an asshole but every sin I struggle with makes me the worst person alive. 

It feels so lonely. I don’t want to tell my bestfriend cause she’s got more than she can handle on her plate. I don’t want to tell my boyfriend cause he’ll tell me “jiayou”, and I don’t know what to do with that lol.

I need a hug. Or a beer. 

I’m filled with so many unpleasant thoughts right now I want to run away from them and die somewhere so that I don’t have to face myself. 

O lord, take me when I’m young? :’(

Just Give Me A Reason

I'm sorry I don't understand

Where all of this is coming from

I thought that we were fine

(oh we had everything)

Your head is running wild again

My dear we still have everythin'

And it's all in your mind

(yeah but this is happenin')

My suicidal thoughts are back. Help. I don’t even dare to tell anyone anymore because… I don’t want them to know that once again, I want to give up easily. :’(

I don’t know what to do. I’m so stressed out in this r/s. I feel like there’s something inherently wrong with me. And now I feel the stress of breaking up and having to tell everyone why. But we promised to do it as a testimony and I hope I can be a good testimony. I don’t hope that this is how it ends but I can’t seem to like him as much as I should, and I feel trapped :’(

I just really want to die in an accident or something so that I don’t have to deal with this haha. Escapism at its best amirite.

I always wanted to protect you from his outbursts, but now I just want to protect you from me. I’m sorry for being the absolute worst and I’m so sorry for the terrible words that has escaped my mouth. I don’t deserve to say I love you because I didn’t earn it but by God’s grace I’ll keep trying till it’s your turn to go back Home :’(

100421

Last year taught me to deal with things alone. And I really feel like being alone right now.